senile something

A webcomic about life, love, and plagiarism. Updated Monday-Friday. Sometimes.

Tag: work

I Took Remedial Math Once

If a train leaves Cleveland traveling at 45 mph, and another train leaves at the same time from Miami traveling 75 mph, what is 1+1?-

“High One” Will Never Catch On

Makes you wonder how all the guys in our office comics get anything done. Typing in the Senile Something universe has to be awful.-

Red Rover Defense

My degree isn't in math, but it doesn't take a genius to know that coaches have been seriously under-manning their defensive lines.-

He’s Talking to His Mom

Is Slayer hiring?-

Don’t Drink and Doodle

Half of this conversation is true. Also, I'm hungover at band practice as you're reading this. Stay in school. But not in a dumb useless major like us.-

That’s Not What I Would’ve Called It

Scientists are the worst at naming things.-

Billionth Time’s a Charm!

Fuck: this song, this guitar, this studio, you, me, everything, especially this song.-

Cover Comedians

-Just stick with telling Dane Cook jokes to your unfulfilled girlfriend.

Breakfast for weenies

-"Oh, and a diet coke." "Flat coke, coming right up."

Not Enough Bodies At This Party

I'm just kidding, my freezer broke a few years ago.-

Getting older

-You get taller, houses get shorter. It's science.

Love for Coffee Trumps All

-I don't know how he speaks so clearly with a hand in his mouth, either.

I *fart* Senile Something

Highbrow humor is our thing, and what better way to show it?-

Make it Rain Piss

Not that $17 is going to go make much of a dent in these student loans.-

Destroyed

-DESTROY- verb: to reduce (an object) to useless fragments, a useless form, or remains, as by rending, burning, or dissolving; injure beyond repair or renewal; demolish; ruin; annihilate; unable to talk, among other things. LITERAL- adj: in accordance with, involving, or being the primary or strict meaning of the word or words; not figurative or metaphorical; suck it.

To Tame The Beast

"SOMEONE TOOK THE LAST DOUGHNUT?!" "NOOOOOOOOOO, GREEEEEEEG!"-

The importance of being punctual

"It's Tuesday. Also, my name is Austin."-

Rich owners

-No one likes any of those things except coffee-- and there's a Starbucks across the street.

White History Month

-Woah, woah, woah! Can we rename Christmas "Crackermas?"

In which memory is tested

-"You cannot use any of your last six passwords. All passwords must include at least one lowercase letter, one upper case letter, one number and one special character. Do not use your name, birth date, social security number, or any other word or combination of numbers that will be easily remembered."

Morning cup of depression

-Unlike regular bullets, with which you can at least kill yourself.

Edible arrangements at the office

-"Chocolate-less fruit? And they call that 'edible?' I call it false advertising."

Lazy Contraction

-The subliminal message is quite clear.

Birthdays are for sissies

-Happy birthday to Guy 2 from Guy 1. Now get back to work!

Customer honesty representative

-"Yes, I got your message. No, I wasn't on the other line. I memorized your number and made sure to never pick up when you called."

Awkward

Awkward- adj: lacking skill or dexterity; lacking grace or ease in movement; lacking social graces or manners; lacking any clue at all.

Focus Juice

-Patent pending.

Ixnay on the umphay ayday

-Good thing we have people like him working for us.

What being a cop is like

-"God, is there a cop around or something?!"

That’s the spirit

Yeah, I lean back in my chair. Wanna fight about it?-

I’m real good at following stuff.

The same people who make you listen to "Baby got back" as the ring back tune when you call them.-

Rookie Shit Talker

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Cutting out early

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I can’t wait to quit my desk job.

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Good Morning!

Guess how I feel at 5am when I'm really supposed to wake up? Hint: Nothing like the guy in the comic.

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True stories from Senile Something

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Working Late

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Like a dead skunk being sprayed by a live one

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I don’t care

Wait, what?

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You’re fucking fired

Stairs

It’s cold in the webcomic …

Die Happy

No, no I don’t

File sharing

This comic has a box in it, too

Your Union Must Suck

I love coffee

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