senile something

A webcomic about life, love, and plagiarism. Updated Monday-Friday. Sometimes.

Tag: damn

No problem

-"I'm serious, you can't tell anyone." - "I'm serious, stop talking to me."

The Struggle

-"How about you?" - "English. And nothing, to answer your follow up."

Work Ethics

-You know we're not in the office, right?

Priceless

The economy could be booming, if only people adjusted the way they viewed my services.-

Money can’t buy doing less work

-Sort of evens itself out.

All I want to do is whatever I want

"You seem to be going quite a bit over the speed limit, too." - "Bah-- those things are more like suggestions."

-

Fart Gallery

Those farts cost me $9.25, and they were worth every penny.-

Is That a No?

Just kidding, pay for our gas and we'll be there.-

Full-time is a Flat Circle

Guess I'd better just kill myself this weekend to keep it from happening again.-

Being out of sick days sucks

-I should really get a real job.

Fair enough

-Usually he just sits and stares. But I didn't feel like drawing him that way. Please see Monday's comic for explanation.

Beard Envy

And now here I am bragging to you guys about a beard I don't have anymore. Impressed?-

Classy

I'm still just having a five dollar and ten cent meal, though.-

Starving Hardest

Get out there and make a name for yourself. What is your name, by the way? "Fuck You For Listening."-

Living the dream

-And sweat.

Touring Florida

Sleeping in the van, whether I'm driving or not.-

Like for like

-I like everything you do when you're in the same room with me.

The Girl with the Coffee Tattoo

-"Yes, of course. How rude of me. I'll put on a pot right away."

Making Friends

People you meet on tour are full of these great opening lines.-

“What a cute baby, what’s his name?” – “Spot.”

That baby's pretty chill, though.

-

Rules Are Rules

I always shit at work. But I also always shit at home. Basically, I always shit everywhere.-

Nerf Turder

And then they all laughed and pointed at me with their weiners.-

One of those “interpretations” I keep hearing about

-I think this still counts as a comic.

Uninvited

Stay at home and "watch" your movies by yourself, freak.-

Surprise attack coffee comic

-I can make any conversation into a conversation about coffee.

Just Lose It

Paint the town red.-

Seems Legit

-"Oh yea. And you're top in sales like, every week. 'Atta-boy."

Semantics, Two

Gonna get a lot of reading done. Oh, and some naps.-

Crybaby

-So it'll be easier for me to ignore.

Who Knows Anymore

I'll just look online to see if it DAMNIT OUR FAVORITE CHARACTER DIES.-

You keep saying that word …

I just want you to be prepapared for the biggest let down in the history of television.

-

Reason for the seasons

Florida is the monogamy of temperature.

-

Literary Winter is Coming

The future is now, and it's boring. And not just because you have to read it!-

Give ‘Em Smell!

Smells like a bakery and a sewage treatment plant made a baby and then aborted it with a soldering iron.-

April snowers.

It's not snow anymore. It's just confused rain, now.-

Impersonation

Trying new things with our jokes, testing the waters for more experimental stuff. Maybe props.-

Fish Aren’t Funny

Damnit! Ok, just this once.-

Cats are weird.

-Smother it before it wakes up.

Back Pain

Sure, three lifeguards would probably work better than one. But we're talking about aspirin, not big tan hunks.-

“This book is dedicated to that awful band.”

-April Fools. Shit, I mean this really happened.

You’ve reached Google inc, what can I google for you?

I ask because literally everything you can ask me can be answered on the computer.-

 

Breaking News

The guy all the way on the right is Tim. He hears it all the time.-

The honeymoon phase is over

-Step away from the kitten ...

Whoever keeps saying this: please stop.

-The return of death by scissors.

Right Dead Fred

This is definitely the biggest dick I've ever drawn.-

How does it feel to be the first person in history to have a wrong opinion?

-Let's go back to that.

Grow Up

If you hate the number so much, just give me a discount. I'm not spending more money because you're an idiot.-

In which a room needs cleaning.

-No one notices when you clean unless you allow it to get dirty enough first.

Things Only Get Worse

Sometimes the headache is in my eyes, sometimes it's in my soul.-

I’ll fight you

-Oh, it wasn't a joke? Wrong. You're the joke.

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